I was whisked to my step father’s birthday party last night. Had a wonderful time, a great time with a steak and a few beers and I can’t tell you how LONG its been since I was able to enjoy myself like that. Wonderful time.
At some point I got up to offer a toast. “I couldn’t have asked for a better step father….” and later in the evening he approached me and mentioned how proud he was of me. “Those teddy bears you make, you’ve done some really great things with them. You really have. You’ve touched people. Your teddy bears give people hope….”
I was stung, because I had been thinking about it alot. I’ve gotten emails from people (Benne is one I’ll never forget), about how their own teddy bear has helped them through some rough times, how this particular bear of mine is a sense of promise (thank you Sarah Smith!), and that there is something in this mad knitting of mine that makes these teddy bears something remarkable and close to the heart.
I had thought about putting them aside for a while…and I did for a good month! But, they’ve been tugging at me, tugging at my heart, and the emails just simply confirmed what I knew would be true: I can’t give these little guys up. I just can’t. I love them too much. And more so, I love the emails I get from people who’ve adopted a bear and the feeling of gladness and connection I get from hearing their stories. Beth’s bear, if you remember, was a very important one for me. How could I stop? How could I deny life to another teddy bear? How could I have been dumb enough to think that these bears would be forgotten when I hear so many great stories about how they aid and comfort, bring smiles to lives, bring joy?
There’s no way I can stop, especially after hearing my step father’s comments, some of the comments on this very blog, and the touching email I received from Benne earlier today.
I’ll march on. I may never be a rich man from doing this, but isn’t about the money, is it? Its about this wild world in which we live that gets smaller and smaller…..when you have something as simple as a sad faced teddy bear to bring you closer and closer.
I’ve got one I’m proud of now. I don’t have a name for him. He’s a pinch smaller than my other ones. But, he’s made of the most delicious cashmere I’ve ever had the pleasure of working with. He’s smoky grey, quiet, and so soft I felt the tenderness of the yarn in my hands as a luxury. It was a small skien of yarn I never thought was ample enough to make a bear, but as life shows you in wildly wonderful ways, beauty will find a way to be born. And here he is:
If you’d like to adopt him, click here.
I’m smiling 🙂 My little teddy bears mean something.