So, after a simple bit of outrage at the end of last week, I took this internet and shut it down. Walked away. Spent the weekend in a self imposed lock down away from the interwebs. Went over to George’s to do laundry, took my knitting, and popped in a nice chair in his back yard so I could sit in the sun and knit. Usually when I go over, I sit in that chair and work up teddy bears and George wanders around his back yard pruning plants, and somewhere in that time, we chit chat back and forth and visit with each other while some nice little Caribbean music gets played from the radio. Two hours later, my laundry is done and I head back home. But, this last trip was a little different. Not long after I arrived, George mentioned he had an errand to run, wouldn’t be long and to just go ahead and get my laundry started. So, I did my usual. Laundry, big chair, sun, knit……for only about 5 minutes. I put the needles down for a moment and just looked around his back yard. Then I could hear the simple rustle of the breeze kiss the leaves of the trees in a hushed, faded whisper. There was no music to be heard other than the birds musicly aligned with each other’s chorus of quiet chirping. I put my needles in my lap and sat there for an hour in that near silence. Nothing to stimulate, nothing to entertain, nothing to ponder. I didn’t want to read a book, I didn’t want to play a game, I didn’t want to talk or be heard. I wanted to sit and listen carefully to nothing.
I think we get so wrapped up in constantly being plugged in that we forget about the importance of nourishing the soul with silence, with quiet alone time. We seek the council and advice on the nutrition needed for a clean, healthy body, or games and puzzle that keep the mind sharp and alive, but I think we forget sometimes how important it is to let quiet come in sometimes. The soul gets agitated sometimes, I think, because it needs as much attention as the rest of our being, but we fill our heads with so much stimulation and noise, that the soul can’t be heard. It can only be heard in silence. And what does it tell us? Nothing that we know in words, only a feeling of truth, completeness, realness. Absolute realness.
I’m thankful I had that time. I remembered something about emotions and connections, about pointed fingers and blame, about assumptions that aren’t true.
I posted this video last week and I was clearly emotional. And see, that’s hard for me because my emotions were going two fold at the moment.
I was angry that I had ALLOWED myself to get angry. I tend to think of myself as patient and understanding, and that was put to the test. I saw the spinning wheels in my head clearly lean towards the more cut throat…..and I in no way wish to live in that mind set….EVER. The other part of my emotional thank you was reading all of the emails of support that came in. I am fully aware of how blessed a man I am. People from all over the globe sent me emails to remind me of truth, wisdom, and….the patience and tolerance that I was tested on. And you’re all so right. We meet adversity, we deal with it, we pick up our skeins of yarn, and knit on. We don’t harbor ill will, and we don’t challenge adversity with aggression. We learn, we grow, we remember to be silent sometimes and to just listen to the soul.
Now, there is a special order I just finished up and included was a request for a green bear. That is the third time someone asked me if I would do a green bear. And then a couple of posts back, I thought I’d ask what sort of bear you would all like to see and there was an overwhelming desire to see a green bear. So, here he is.
I named him, “I Found A Bear Along the Way,” because of all my trials and tribulations, I found a bear along the way that comforted me, fed me, gave me shelter and taught me an awful lot about the world that I had yet to learn from books and people. I found a bear on this path of mine that has given me so much more than anything I’ve ever received in life thus far. He gave me a world of friendships all over the planet. He taught me to love again, to not be afraid. He taught me to listen more, and speak less. He taught me that the value in life is not in its possessions, but in its actions.
I think in order for all my bears to be where the ought to be for Christmas, that I’ll stop taking orders in the next few weeks. I think somewhere around mid November. I don’t think I’ll do a special Christmas bear this year like I did last year, but would rather concentrate on making sure these little guys get under trees well before Christmas Eve.
So, thank you all again for reminding me, that I wouldn’t have had the great privilege and pleasure of having all of you in my life had I not found a bear along the way…..
I do so hope you’ll adopt him while he’s available. There’s something precious in this bear.