Ok, let’s start with my feet. Hold my hand, don’t worry, follow me. One of the hardest things homeless men deal with is a bad case of trench foot. If you can’t change your socks, nor wash your feet everyday, you lend yourself to some serious problems. I was no exception. My feet became deplorable. You can google trench foot and look it up, I won’t show you pictures.
Even after I had the money to move into my apartment, my desire to constantly keep my boots on was some moment of PTSD. I’d wake and put my boots on immediately. It all erupts from a fear, or an understanding, that Mario and I would have to move now, leave now, keep going. No permanence. Even after three years of living in this little apartment, I still had my bag ready, my boots on, a pillow case set aside to stuff Mario in should we have to bolt….as we had before.
Over the course of this last week I started shedding my “issues,” so to speak. I began confronting them. I began dealing with them, rather than making them my eccentricities. Walgreen’s had a pair of simple slippers, the rubber kind you’re aware of. Sole with a strap over the foot. I got some foot medication and then dealt with the harder part. “As long as you pay your rent, no one is going to make you leave…..” So for a week, I would wake, spray my feet, slide on my slip-ons and go about my day. And in that week my feet cured (and look really soft and nice!) and my spirit rested, some nervousness was smashed. I no longer felt the high intensity, hyper tension of always having to wonder if I’m going to have to leave.
The other issue I had to deal with was my agoraphobia. I haven’t left my 10 block radius in three years. I couldn’t do it without flipping out. “Feeling glitchy” as I call it. I’d get white faced and flushed, my heart would race, I’d sweat like crazy and become immobile. “Get me back to my apartment now!” In the last week, I’ve gone further, breaking further, pushing my boundary further and further out. It was all preparation for tomorrow.
Tomorrow? My friend Phillip invited me to Mega Con. (You’ll have to google that, too, if you’re not familiar). But, in a nutshell, a huge convention of comic book, sci fi, and anime fans. Now, I’m not into that, but upon some investigation, it looked like a lot of fun. And once Phillip bought me a ticket, I knew I had to go. It means so much to him.
“Everyone will be dressed as their favorite character, from their favorite book or film,” he said. And my mind went to racing. I can do this. Its a good 10 miles away, which is way beyond my zone, but dammit. I can do it. Imagine his surprise when I said that I was going to not only go, but dress up.
“As what?” he asked.
“Mad Man Knitting,” I replied.
Oh, can you imagine what I’ve done? Ha! Busting out, rather than slipping out. I’m going to Mega Con wearing my usual jeans, boots and ball cap, but wearing my “MADMANKNITTING” t-shirt and carting my back pack, with yarn, needles, and a teddy bear sticking out. Yep! Phillip said I shouldn’t be surprised if I’m approached by people wondering what anime story I’m in. I could only laugh! I’m really looking forward to it! It will be the first time I’ve gone further than a mile in years! YEARS! My camera is charged and ready. We leave on the bus at 8am tomorrow morning.
Now, we didn’t have the money to get autographs and photo ops with famous people. Alex Kingston will be there! I actually really like her! As well as two of the people from The Walking Dead, which would be great. So, we don’t have the funds for that, so instead, this is the bear I’m taking with me. Follow my plan….
I’m taking this bear with me. See my little signature card I have attached to him? Well, I’m gonna get as many signatures as I can….but, they’ll be character signatures. If I see a Wonder Woman character, I’ll ask her to sign the card. Spiderman? I’m gonna get his, too. Batman, Soul Eater, Dr. Who, anyone and everyone that is charactered up well, I’m gonna get them to sign the tag on my bear. And come Monday afternoon, this bear will be shipped out with all those signatures. Would make an awesome gift, especially if its personalized for someone who is truly into the Mega Con sort of thing, or a kid who loves superheros. That would be awesome! So, if you’d like to adopt him, click here. Selling this bear would truly help out. It would allow me a day to go to Mega Con. And! We’ll be taking a ton of pics of me getting the bear signed while I’m there…..OH! And if you ARE going to be there (they said 60,000 people will be), come find me! Say hello! Say hello! The more friendly faces I have outside my comfort zone, the better 🙂
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