Kung Fu Knitter!

Ok, take a good look at that picture. Can you see the wince in my face? Trying to hold it back, but just couldn’t. Every movement of every muscle has been painful. Why? Well, wanting to get ourselves back in shape, Phillip and I have been learning Kung Fu. I’m putting on more weight (125, bitches! woot!), and wanting my lean muscular form back. But, have you ever tried Kung Fu? Oh, mercy. Don’t dismiss a pose or movement with names as strangely soft and sincere as “Chicken Step” or “Horse Stance.” They are evil.  Evil, I tell you. And why? Because you see the movement and position demonstrated and you arrogantly “pfff” and say, “I can do that.” …..Then you try. AND BAM! Every muscle in your body burns for days. Both of us have been moving around the house with hobbling gate, moaning as we stroll. Now, it doesn’t mean we’re beating each other up, we’re still in basic movements sessions. We’re still in battle with our own worn out, over 45, allegedly washed up bodies.

But, we love it.

We truly do. We picked Kung Fu because when you look at the basic Shaolin movements, they look like dance. I mean, one limp wrist and a puckered lip and Kung Fu becomes voguing. Kung Fu really is a beautiful art.

So, there we were, taking some pictures to promote the blankets in my shop that I need to sell and woah….woah is me. Sitting on the couch, “owww. OWW!” Crossing my arms, “OUCH! Screw that damned Chicken Step.” Meanwhile, Phillip is across the room with the camera telling me, “We’ll just have to take the picture from this angle because I can’t move my legs any lower….damned Horse Stance….”

When about 500 pictures were taken, all with a wince from the subject, and a groan from the photographer, we settled on this one. The one that shows the least amount of pain. 🙂 I find it hilarious and fun. I mean, come on. A year ago I was nearly dead. Here I am in pain because I’m working my little body back to health. Those are good pains. The kind you can laugh at. “Hey, Phillip! Double dog dare you that you can’t lift that coffee cup…..while in Horse Stance.”

“Oh, yeah? Well, I double dog dare YOU not to do Chicken Stance and look like a girl!”


So, we’re looking for a much needed recovery day (slash) movie day tomorrow to rest our muscles. We’ll be watching the latest American Horror Story, Blood Drive, and Z Nation all while doing a comparison of who REALLY has the most authentic movie theater butter popcorn (Orville or Pop Secret?)

Grab a manly granny in the shop. I need to go soak my little chicken legs. 🙂

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  1. I know that feeling. Tai chi has names like “picking up the comb from the bottom of the ocean” which sounds and looks lovely and graceful but makes for some sore muscles afterwards.

    It gets better…..

  2. Had me laughing with this post. I get the same feeling if I haven’t gone to the gym often enough and trying to do what I did on the last visit. Crunches especially can have me wincing the next day. I also get cramp or really sore legs if I managed to do over 15,000 steps in a day.

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