This Confession is For My Enemy

An excerpt from my forthcoming book, “The Confessions of a MadManKnitting.”

You would think that I was describing a street gang, but oh, to see the look on your face when I tell you it has become an all out brawl between knitters.

The average non-knitter tends to think of knitters as matronly ladies with bifocals and blue rinses with lovely discussions about the grandchildren and gladiolas both growing at amazing rates.

I wish it were that simple. For those of you that do not know, knitting has turned from an innocent moment of contemplation into a weapon of total destruction.

(I hear prayer tends to be a lot like that now, too. Some people pray for good things to happen to others….and others pray that some are destroyed).

For the past decade or so, this craft was already teetering on the edges of infiltration. But, in the past few years, or even months by these recent stories, knitting has been hijacked by terrorists with demands. And their demands are quite simple: the elimination of knitting as a craft.

Knitting is now the harbinger of political policies, identity inclusion, and social media warfare. Knitters are being booted and banned from websites and groups, ostracized in public forums, shunned from festivals, being put on lists to be boycotted, their livelihoods taken away, their incomes destroyed, their work touted as meaningless.

Somehow, knitters got tossed out by the “knitting community.” Yes, some were boldly and aggressively asked to leave by the local Party Affiliation Leaders at the most recent Knitting Education Summits (we used to call those weekly “knit alongs”). Others, like myself were demonized, destroyed, beat into submission. Not by the very people who supported us, mind you. But, by the very people who had never even heard of us until they were told in cultist language that we were enemies.

And many of my supporters who have read this blog will agree!

But, I was asked by Trisha Allison if I was writing this book to preach to the choir. Absolutely not. A lot of people who support me will understand exactly what I’m doing with this book.

This book is being written for people who do not understand the power of their own hatred. I want them to see just what their actions can cause another human they have never met, never known of, but were told to annihilate because they did not submit to the ridiculous notion that skin color, sexual identity, and gender are more valuable to the craft rather than to the actual yarn itself.

Yes, this book is being written for the very people that have done their best to destroy knitters for the sake of their Party’s policies, who turned Sip and Knits into “A Town Hall on Equality.”

This book is for you. I’m sure my regular readers will love it. But, I hope it lands in the hands of someone who wanted to strike me but, discovers upon knowing me that they would rather just sit and knit with me…

I’ll confess to that desire to sit and knit with my enemy…..will you?

If you appreciate my writing and would like for this blog to continue, please donate to help keep it going. Every single dollar helps! I couldn’t do it without your support.


  1. I am nauseated by the idea that there are folks out there who want to impale me with their 4.5mm straights, garrote me with their 36” 3.5mm circular, shove a esophagus-blocking ball of felt down my throat, and stab me with blocking pins – just because I hold different political and/or religious beliefs than they do. I don’t want to endure an auto da fe as a precondition to be permitted to buy a pattern, attend a fiber festival, or participate in a KAL. I just want to be able to stitch and bitch. And eat the munchies and drink the wine or tea or whatever while each of us admired the others’ handiwork or sympathizes with the victim of the gauge that lied, the dye lot that was inconsistent, or the lace pattern from Hell.

    1. When I said that I just wanted to knit in peace, I was told that my statement proved that I was, indeed, “privileged.” Wanting to knit in peace is an overt display of never having to NOT knit in peace, and, therefore, a demonstration of violence and hatred toward those who do NOT get to experience the privilege of knitting in peace…..or something. There are dog turds in my backyard that make more sense.

  2. “You would think I was describing a street gang, but oh to see your face when I tell you it’s become an all out brawl between knitters.”. That’s hilarious !

    I really do hope you can change some hearts. Us, your fellow choir members totally get it, We see the cruelty, the witch hunts, the burnings at the stake and the hangings, the total devastation left in their wake. The swarm descends on innocents and does it’s damndest to totally annihilate the chosen victim du jour. The joy they express is ghoulish. Too bad for them we are like a Phoenix, we rise from the ashes and become more beautiful and more powerful than we were before. Stronger and better people.

    I have great hopes for your book, your Phoenix. Rock on madman, bring sunlight into the knitting world, set us all free! Love is still the most powerful force in the universe. Bless you for this. I hope your book is wildly successful.

  3. I hope your book is read by many, I believe that some (and I mean some) people following in this cult like behaviour are just good hearted people, then there are the other people that seem to have some deep rooted anger, hatred and lack compassion and empathy. I’ve been around people who thoroughly enjoy destroying others…..I think it’s to do with trying to gain some power…because deep down these people feel powerless, and it’s not nice seeing them enjoying destroy another human being I feel sad for them because there is no real joy and love there. Then you have the meek who get swept along with it all, reading all the books and blindly following, these people have some kind of overactive empathy switch ( I was this person once) and lack boundaries, this is all my own perception and I’m probably projecting some of it, but that’s my view. It’s awful what’s happening and it’s not just in the knitting community. But I shall be sitting in my corner of the community quietly knitting (and crocheting) and watching to see what happens.

  4. I laughingly and totally agree with you.
    I too wish to do my crafting in peace, although I only crochet.
    I was taught to knit by my grandmother, she was very patient with me and, eventually, I made my first scarf. It was short, only 4 1/2 feet long, but I did it! From there I jumped headlong into needlepoint and other embroidery, learning to do fabric painting and colouring with dyes, leather work, bead work, weaving of lace and other materials. I even taught those things to hobbyists. Because it was fun! I never charged for teaching folks as so much gossip and drinking occurred. I did however, charge for the kits I assembled for my classes.
    And then, lately, about two years ago, I picked up my crochet hooks; and haven’t put them down. I drop them; but that’s only because my the fingers and hands are numb from peripheral neuropathy. I always pick them, and my project up, up again; and keep on crocheting.
    I can’t do any of the other stuff anymore merely because I simply can’t feel the sewing and tapestry needle,s or even the beads due to the neuropathy. And, due to several strokes, I don’t knit anymore, stitches are too wobbly and uneven, and I keep dropping one of the knitting needles (no matter the gauge); I can’t hold on to it.And I lose track of my stitch and row counts.

    Anyway… Keep on knitting.
    Peace be upon you!

  5. I was just at Rhinebeck for 3 days, 4 separate events. Never once did I hear anything like the codswallop you are espousing here. I don’t know where you are getting your information, maybe it is just Florida. I see a lot of writing and pearl clutching about it, but I don’t see it on the ground.

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