I received this comment on my blog last night from a woman who called herself “Angry Knitter.” I read it, thought for a moment, then basically said that I would devote my next blog post to her comment. Because I felt her questions argumentative, but valid. So, rather than you read her comment in full, then read my response, I thought all would be better served if I took each of her comments and answer them one on one, in a more conversational tone. That is after all, what I’ve been begging for.
But, before I begin I would like to thank her for reading my blog posts. In a sea of a bazillion blogs and podcasts and youtube videos, that she should happen to find me, that I might have written something that makes her want to reach out to me, makes me actually very grateful.
So, let’s get on with it….
“You want to “build bridges”. You want to gather together and talk, but Trump’s goal is to build walls. I’m a Mexican. I’m terrified every single day that I live in this country that I’ll be hunted down like an animal by ice, thrown in a van, and put in a camp.”
I’m terrified for you, Angry Knitter, I really am. Because I think the very people that you find comfort in, friendships in, and confidence in are lying to you, and are purposely manipulating your emotions by using fear tactics. The very group that you seek peace and tolerance in, is the very group that is pushing you to a level of hysterical fear. My side never said, “Let’s round up all the Mexicans, throw them in vans, then throw them in camps.” No, YOUR side said that…. YOUR friends and acquaintances and news sources are the ones that told you that. Because once they can convince you to be afraid of us, they can convince you to hate us….and with that hate they can convince you to eliminate us. They only way to no longer live in fear is to get rid of us….
Believe it or not, we want to build the wall to protect you. And the very fact that you would reach out to me tells me that in your heart of hearts you do feel truth when I say I want to build bridges. And I think you want to build bridges, too.
“This is a reality that millions are facing. And you want to sit at a table with me still? You think you’re welcome to eat with me? I’m an American citizen, but I’m brown and my family is from Mexico and that is enough for me to be hated.”
Yes, I do want to sit at a table with you. The most blessed moment of our coming face to face is always over breaking bread. I would hope that I’m welcome to come and eat with you, because that would be a gracious thing for you to offer. It would signify that you would want to peacefully sit down, enjoy a nice meal, talk things out and get to know each other, figure out what is wrong and how we can fix it….together. But, if I’m not welcome at your table, my response would never be to DEMAND that you allow me a seat. No, my response could ONLY be that you’re always welcome to come to my table if you would really like to talk, even if I’m not welcome to yours.
And again, I’m not sure who told you that being brown in America was something to be fearful of. My suspicion is that it’s the same group of villainous manipulators that say they have your best interests at heart. Please, be very careful of people who demand you live in fear. Those aren’t your friends, those aren’t your colleagues. Trust me on this, Angry Knitter.
“The fact that some knitting website banned open support of hatred and segregation has you angry is appalling. Also, you say that you’re gay right? So you know what it feels like to feel different, to be afraid. I’m a lesbian. I know that pain too. You understand that pain, yet you stand against other who experience that same pain in different ways. How can you do that? How can you stand against us?”
Ok, this is where I call “bullshit.” I can be fair, but I can also be brutally honest. If you’re defining yourself by your sexuality, then you know absolutely nothing about yourself. If the most impressive thing about you is your mating habits, then you’re as primitive as any amoeba I’ve seen on documentary TV.
There has GOT to be something more interesting about you than your sexuality. I’m giving you some homework, Angry Knitter. Write 25 fascinating things that describe yourself without calling yourself a victim. Write down your character traits, your accomplishments. See if you can do it without claiming to be “marginalized.”
No pain of mine ever came from being gay. So, I can’t relate to that. Yes, again, the same people that you hold close that told you being brown was bad, also told you that being gay was bad….
I’m urging you, Angry Knitter, to broaden your circle of friends, your sources of information, whatever. But, someone has enslaved you with the idea that everything about you is wrong and to be hated!…..and it wasn’t me. It wasn’t my side. It was your close associates that told you that. Not mine.
“And then have the nerve to say you’re upset that a knitting website is dividing us. No, YOU’RE dividing us. You CHOSE to stand alongside a man who BUILDS WALLS. You CHOSE to stand alongside a man who harasses women and speaks about entire groups of people as though they are less than human.”
Well, in regards to that I’d like to first mention that while Trump is still trying to build his wall, Ravelry successfully constructed a virtual one in a day with a statement that basically said, “You are not welcome here, we are shutting you out.”
Physical barriers and divisions are something we’ve done since the beginning of time and something that we employ on a daily basis. Everything from picket fences to iron gates are readily, hungrily sought after by people all over the world every single moment someone takes claim to what is theirs so that it can be protected. So that you can have your own haven separated from everyone else’s madness. A place of bliss, your own little bubble. I don’t know where you are right now, I don’t know your living situation, but I DO know that your heart yearns for a place where you can be free to be a brown Mexican Lesbian who has the right to do what she wants on her own fenced in, bordered land and no one can tell her otherwise. Agreed? You know you want that. And the minute you get it, you’re going to be protect it.
However, ideological divisions and barriers that are used to separate us are evil. And don’t forget that, Angry Knitter. When someone urges you to divide us because of our opinions, run. Don’t stop, just run. Those people aren’t interested in our liking each other. Those people are poisoning you with a self interest that harms both you and I.
I’m glad we had this opportunity. Maybe you didn’t think I’d respond, maybe you’re glad I did. I’d love to know.
I’m going to pray that someday you and I will be sitting at that table, either yours or mine, breaking bread, indulging ourselves, you handing your favorite dish to me, and I in turn, handing my favorite dish to you as we build dialogue, as we build a bridge, hands over the table, passing our best to each other.
And I am so looking forward to experiencing your best.
If you appreciate my writing and would like for this blog to continue, please donate to help keep it going. Every single dollar helps! I couldn’t do it without your support.