I felt rather embarrassed about having to ask a friend to buy me cat litter yesterday. But, I didn’t have a choice.
It isn’t all bad. Not at all. As a matter of fact, March was one of the first starts of the month where the fridge was full and the bills were paid. The only problem is that there was nothing else left. I mean nothing. Coffee, cat litter, laundry detergent, packing tape….I certainly am in no need of creative art supplies.
I have an anonymous benefactor who has been sending me canvas, hoops, needles and embroidery floss. And I have to confess that spending my time in the silence of that art has my monastic nature just bubbling at the moment. Those moments spent watching my wildflowers dance along the fence are so important to me.
SO, I’m in one of those off places where I’m not quite on track. I’m either ahead of myself, or behind myself at the moment. My timing, my flow are just a little off when it comes to our finances right now. I will start charging more for my embroidery, I really don’t have a choice. I’ve been selling them for really low prices just to keep the funds coming in. But, of course, it takes me a good 3 or 4 days to finish a piece….In that time, I do my best to put the work down and pick up a bear….But, it’s only a moment or two before I just feel the need to dash back to the embroidery. And $50 for 4 days worth of work isn’t very smart when it only takes 4 hours to knit a teddy bear….My heart just isn’t in it.
So, if I had a few days to breathe, I could really work up some amazing pieces, start framing them so that they’re worth the price, and really start moving this whole adventure into a reality that eventually pays me, while already beautifully rewarding my soul. I’m inclined to call this piece that I’m working on “Soul.”
You see, nothing is really stark at the moment, and I’ll take poverty if it should mean that I’m living in bliss. Again, how very monastic 🙂 Which isn’t that surprising. I’ve often thought of Honeychurch as a little abbey with only two initiates, who don’t have very much, but who enjoy the solace and refuge of a bright sunny spot in a very dark world. A place where they share their comfort and stories of warmth for anyone to read. And like most monasteries, sometimes we just need a little helping nudge. A few things for Honeychurch could really help us out.
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