Ok, so I know I write often about the importance of hope, and the idealism of optimism, and how those things are vitally important to your well being, your soul, your remembering that a better life cannot be sought unless you truly enjoy the one you already have. Some people have called it mumbo jumbo, New Age nonsense. Ah, to hell with them. Others liken it to prayer. Ah, to heaven they will go. If I had not believed in the power of positive thinking (thank Dr. Norman Vincent Peale), then I would not have gone as far as I have. I would have remained homeless. I would been trapped in that stack of hellish self doubt that keeps people buried in their own misery…and what is worse: I would have begun to not only accept that tragedy as my fate, I would have found some harmony in it. But, no. Prayer and positivity are vital to self reliance. Furthermore, don’t ever think you are alone, nor invisible.
I have a story I’d like to share about what happened to me this afternoon. My debit card went missing last week. I did the correct thing and had it reported lost or stolen, called them up, they were kind and polite, helpful and friendly and said a new one was on the way….and you can expect it in about 5 to 7 business days. Brilliant. Thank you….wait….WAIT! That means I won’t have access to my funds and bills that rely on that card’s numbers to get paid. WAIT!!!! STOP!!!! What was I to do?
Now, don’t panic, I told myself, we’ll figure this out. That gives us until Monday or Tuesday of this week. (Today or tomorrow before my card arrives). I had $100 cash to last us one week to buy whatever we needed. I’ve lived on less. This will be easy, right? Well, back then I wasn’t feeding two humans and two furries, I didn’t have a yarn truck that needed gas and insurance, I wasn’t recovering from pneumonia. SHIT! We ran out of cash Saturday. And this morning we ran out of coffee. The yarn truck ran out of gas. I started coughing like crazy. Nothing has sold in the shop, but what would it matter? We can’t get to the funds until my card arrives anyway. Ok, I know what I’ll do. I’ll call my mother. I HATE doing that. But, my plan was to call my mother, transfer money to her, and have her call and buy a Publix gift card over the phone, I’d pick it up and gather what we needed to last us a few more days until my card arrives. She said, “Of course. Just call Publix to see if they’ll take care of that.” So, I did.
I got the manager on the phone and said, “My name is Gregory,” and explained what I’d like to do. He said, “No, we can’t do that, but how much were you looking to get on the card?”
About $50 to tide us over.
“Well, we’ll just give you a gift card for that amount. It’s not a problem. We know you, you shop here every morning, you’ve come here for years and we’d be glad to help you out….”
I thought I was going to cry.
He said, “We love you. You’re a great customer.”
Now, keep in mind. I have very little verbal interaction with anyone there. I pop in, grab what I need, then head back home as soon as I can (that’s what an agoraphobic does). But, he knew what I looked like, down to my ball cap, and remembered an encounter we had a few months ago. He knew me. He knew my shopping habits, knew what I bought. And all this time I didn’t think anyone really saw me there dashing in and out with what I needed to feed my family. Apparently, they all knew my name. They appreciated me, and more so, were willing to say, “We can do this. Not a problem.”
Even writing about it I get weepy eyed.
An hour later I had gift card in hand, had procured coffee (don’t give me crap, I’m allowed two cups a day now and I’m not giving them up for nothing), things I needed for my recovery and health, and some groceries.
I didn’t sit back and think, “Nothing has sold, life sucks, I’ll just sit here and suffer.” I gave God, the Universe, my openness, my prayers, my desire and ambition to get through a minor rough patch, learned only from truly horrible life experiences: hope.
When I have some extra money, I’m going to give them back another gift card for the same amount and ask that they give it to someone in need someday. All flows in, all flows forth. But, only if you’ll allow it. Negativity blocks. Positivity breeds.
It was a great day to learn another valuable lesson. Say a prayer for yourself tonight. Pray for others, of course, but save some prayers for yourself. You’ll be fine. Believe it or not, you’re not invisible. Don’t forget that: you are not invisible.
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