He was SUPPOSED to be a Sock Monkey

Ah, but our intuition never fails us, does it?

I have a cute little story for you about my very first teddy bear. Well, there is actually a very VICIOUS story about my teddy bear that will be spoken in length about in an upcoming book, but for now? Let’s go with the cute story about my first teddy bear. (Look at you! All ready to hear more about the devilish version….In time!)

My first teddy bear was actually supposed to be a sock monkey.

I was supposed to knit a sock monkey, sell it, buy myself some food. That was it, that was the plan. There was no desire for something more at that time. No, back then, I had one thing on my mind: hunger. I needed food. I  had a bag of grits and an illegal can of whale blubber left to eat with. (Again, I’ll tell you about the whale blubber some OTHER time).

So, at Joann’s they had these big beautiful skeins of Lionbrand’s Fisherman’s Wool in Oak Tweed for about $8. And with my 50 percent off coupon, I bought it for $4. My grandmother had left behind a small stash of red and black from her own knitting (oh, you’re going to love this book when it’s finished. “Grandmother left behind what?”)

Now, why, you may ask, a sock monkey? Because they were very popular at the time. Oh, they were everywhere then. Worse than Beanie Babies. (And those damned Beanie Babies seemed to be like cockroaches in Florida during the wet season. Just….EVERYWHERE!)

But, the more I thought of it, the more I realized I’ve never been very good at jumping on trends. I’ve always sort of…followed my own path. There was no way I was going to do, make, or knit something that everyone else is already doing. So, I knit a teddy bear instead….That changed my life forever. Trusting my gut changed my life forever.

(And when you read the book you’ll see, I almost tossed that knit teddy bear into a burn pit, already charring up someone else’s things, someone who screwed me, then scorned me….Damn, you’re gonna love my next book).

He was knit up, stuffed up, and sewn up and he looked….Well, he looked…desolate. He looked sad. He looked like he wanted out of that misery….and possibly just needed someone to hug him to make that happen.

And oh, the beautiful things that happened because of his face, because of his story.

But, his story has changed. My story has changed. And I want this little bear to be remembered for our moment together. In peace, in pursuit of a better life.

As I move on to new yarn, this little guy is being retired. Because he needs to be a symbol of that moment, he needs to be placed in my heart where only he and I know just why he didn’t end up being burned in a pit. (You really are gonna love this book).

But, before he goes, he’s going to help other people now. Someone else is in need of some symbol of hope and comfort. Someone out there needs something to hold in their darkest times. And he’ll be there. JUST when you need him.

Believe it or not, this is the only bear I make up that I actually hug before I send out. Because he really is the teddy bear that saved me. So, I thank him. Each and every time I ship this buddy of mine, knowing he’s going to save someone else now. I’m going to miss him, but other people need to hold him now.

If you’d like to hold my little teddy bear click here. There are only four.

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